Where is Timmothy Pitzen?

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On the morning of May 11, 2011, Amy Fry-Pitzen picked up son Timmothy from his kindergarten classroom and … well, if you’ve been following the many local and national headlines about this mystery since then, you know the tragic details of the case.

A mother struggling with depression and an unhappy marriage takes her little boy on a three-day vacation that included Brookfield Zoo and a water park in the Wisconsin Dells. Then she commits suicide inside a Rockford motel room, leaving behind a note that says her child is safe with people who cared for him but that he’ll never be found.

[Read More in the Chicago Tribune]

49 Responses to Where is Timmothy Pitzen?

  1. This is awful, and every dad’s worst nightmare. I hope Timmy is reunited with his father one day.

    • I agre. I’m wondering if mom had post-partum and she just didn’t know how to ask for help?

      • I don’t see how post-partum depression can be used as an explanation for such a heinous and cruel act. Everyone gets depressed sometimes, some more than others, but depression doesn’t rob you of your ability to feel empathy or to reason out rational choices for others. Suicide can explain the suicide, but the kidnapping (and let’s be honest, probably murder), of the child is inexcusable.

      • Sorry, I meant depression can explain the suicide, but not the kidnapping and murder.

      • Margo/Mom says:

        Murder might explain the suicide. But I still prefer to believe the kid is alive somewhere. If nothing else, the suicide is an ultimate escape from any consequences, so no need to hide the body.

  2. Kitty says:

    Remember that the government created all these sexust laws,and in a male dominated government what else would be created.Lets akso remember that God created these children in these mothers to be their mothers,yhis is a normal natural instinct to care and never leave your child.How do you call it kid knapping, but if they neglect the kuds like they want them to ,thats illegal too.

    • Kitty the mom in this case killed herself but not before she hid her son somewhere.
      Timmothy Pitzen is out there somewhere but they don’t know where he is?

    • Yes Kitty, men created these laws, and they created them to BENEFIT WOMEN. By buying into the lie that women are naturally better care-givers, and that women must be protected, we have created a court system that is hostile and unfair to fathers. The mother killed this kid. People can hope all they want, but chances are the kid is dead. And now the father must grieve for his son, but he will never find closure or peace, because he will always maintain hope that his son is still alive. He will remain in a state of perpetual loss and grieving. This is the cruelest thing Amy Friy-Pitzen could have possibly done to this man. May she burn in Hell.

      • Margo/Mom says:

        I have been doing some reading on this case as it progressed. Personally I hope and believe the child is still alive, and for several reasons. One, she bought children’s clothing and toys while she was travelling with him–and just before the final disappearance/suicide. Second, the child has gone missing–as in, no body has been found. Now, while there are lots of ways to make a body disappear, one has to wonder what reason one would have to do so if committing suicide.

        Now apparently this Mom had some history of depression–including prior suicide attempts–as well as a prior history of divorce (three prior marriages, I believe). Friends/family report she was fearful that if she were to divorce Timmothy’s father that she would not get custody due to her history. I think we can see more evidence in this case of disordered thinking than of corrupt or biased laws and courts.

        There is also some suggestion that she had planned this out in advance–having taken some unexplained trips prior that had caused friction with her husband. Could have been an affair, but in retrospect were more likely about setting up what she planned to do. My guess is that whoever she was working with was not included in the suicide plan, but may have believed that Mom was going to disappear herself, or meet up later in some other place and time. Also–when Mom’s vehicle was recovered the car sear and Timmothy’s backpack were not there. Suggests not hiding a body, but handing off a live child.

      • Margo/Mom, I certainly hope that is the case. Obviously a live child is better than a dead one any day of the week. However, that still leaves a child that has lost both of his parents, and a father who has lost a son. Can you imagine the daily horror of never knowing if your child is dead or alive, or who he’s with if he’s alive? No matter how this played out, Amy was incredibly selfish and callous.

      • Gail says:

        I believe this child is alive.I think he was put into the underground network that helps poor abused ,battered women whom cant afford the attorneys.While in most cases the woman would never harm her own child having carried that person within her and suffering labor.I don’t agree with the underground, issues should be worked out but never in court.She must have known who these people were and they knew she would tell,so they killed her and made it look like a suicide.In most cases the father is in on it with the underground ,but maybe thats not true in this case.The government makes laws to push parents into running and then often the same or connected to the government ,as look outs in court,are in the underground also.While they saved many women and children from abusive homes and especially the children that are placed alone with abusers after allegations of mothers unfittness.This is typical of fathers that are abusive and dont want to pay child support.They lie and say the woman is either on drugs or depressed,to buld a case, to try to place child with a sister of his to avoid responsibility.What she did was not good for the child.I dont care what the father is worried about ,theblaws are to help the child ,not serve the parents,either side.once they do that they then see that both parties are going to lose and the government will take that child.As children became court and government property,from our new laws.

      • Gail, mothers hurt and/or kill their children ALL THE TIME. And as far as children being placed with abusers, it happens all the time when courts take children away from their fathers and place them with an abusive mother.

        Naming the Failures – Lt. Steve Blevins

      • Kitty says:

        You must be crazy to say laws are to benefit women

    • You must be crazy to say that I must be crazy to say laws are to benefit women. Game, set, match.

      • Jessica says:

        I know this thread is old, but…

        The car seat was located at a relatives house, having been removed from the car prior to them leaving.

        There is an ex-husband involved, one she had been visiting frequently behind her husband’s back. Her “first love”. Husband found out she’d been sneaking off to see him, gave her an ultimatum, threatened to divorce her if she didn’t stop it, said he’d take custody and she wouldn’t ever see the kid again. Ex-husband claims they were merely friends. Her family believes she was still in love with him. Last phone call she ever made was to that ex.

        Forensics found mud/grass/weeds stuck beneath the car, which science indicates it had driven into a field somewhere with very few trees.

        My theory? She gave the kid the time of his life, bought him toys, took him fun places, then took his life. She disposed of him in a field somewhere (the father said she wouldn’t see the kid again, so she made it so HE’D never see the kid again. If ever found, he would be guaranteed to still never have him). Then she killed herself. Her ex didn’t want her. Depression paired with rejection, then add in the husband threatening to take the kid… yeah, he’ll never be found again, but she made it so the man will spend the rest of his life wondering and mourning and looking.

  3. Margo/Mom says:

    Walter–yes, harms that can never be undone. As far as selfish and callous? Well that is a typical and perfectly reasonable response to suicide. But I think at the end of the day people who experience profound depression that leads to suicide are people who live in a world of pain and hopelessness. Choices made within that context must be regarded as disordered and growing out of profoundly diseased thinking.

    Where we really need to be concerned is with the folks who look at a mother like this and see instead some heroic act of protection, buying in by hiding a child or children from family and friends (like the Dahlens) based on some notion that laws, courts and protection agencies (not to mention spouses/former spouses, grandparents and the like) are not to be trusted.

    • Gail says:

      My neice has the issue

    • Kitty says:

      Why are they thinking she was depressed ,word of her spouse?

      • Margo/Mom says:

        I believe that she had a prior suicide attempt and had been diagnosed and treated for depression.Then there is the suicide itself. I also saw interviews with her family–mother and others–who recounted her concerns that should she divorce the courts would not be willing to allow her custody based on her mental health history.

      • You think that people are going to show that they’re depressed? No.
        Maybe mom was good at hiding her depression because she didn’t want that to be the deciding factor on who would get custody of the little boy.

    • Gail says:

      Ex husbands always lie and families that want to cause trouble

    • Kitty says:

      The slaves had under ground railroad too and nobody thinks tbey werent heros now.Im sure back then the government said it was a terrible crime to help them too.

  4. Kitty says:

    I think the underground killed her,cause they didnt trust she wouldnt tell who they are.

  5. Kitty says:

    Your talking more about the father suffering than the child.The child is the only concern here.The issue is that a woman turned to the only available resorce,the underground.The laws need to be made by women that have been through labor and know the lies made by opposing parties.Very insulting saying that laws are made by men that benefit women.That was intended to provoke ny women even your Stepford residers.The situation needs to change on the legal level.Not by any makes,peers of mothers can only be women.Real legal changeof all the laws in place.The underground is run by lawyers ,judges and court personelle.They work both sides.They are also involved in bad crimes I believe against children once they are at the mercy of that network.I dont agree with the way they handle this.We need above ground rights as mothers ,battered women and children.Until then I would Saint the woman that gives her life for her childs safety.

    • You’re talking more about the mother suffering than the child. The child is the only concern here. The issue is that a father turned to the only available resource, the cops, and they failed him. The laws need to be made by men that have been fathers and know the lies made by opposing parties. Very insulting saying that laws are made by men that benefit men. The situation needs to change on the legal level. Not by any females, peers of fathers can only be men. Real legal change of all the laws in place. The underground is run by lawyers, judges and court personnel. They work both sides. They are also involved in bad crimes I believe against children once they are at the mercy of that network. We need above ground rights as fathers, abused men and children. Until then I would Saint the man that gives his freedom for his child’s safety.

      See how I turned that all around? Doesn’t feel so good does it? The fact is, there are abusive mothers and innocent protective fathers out there as well, and the police are so quick to protect abusive mothers, that a loving father has no place to turn. The police failed to protect my children – if only I had an underground movement to protect them. https://waltersingletons.wordpress.com/2016/10/26/naming-the-failures-lt-steve-blevins/

      • tori green says:

        I agree with Walter S, very well said “peers of fathers can only be men”. I would take it further and say peers of fathers should only be fathers….
        As far as the system…I am a female and I have seen how easy is it to get a male arrested on domestic violence charges. Just your word and a bruise will do for an arrest because they won’t actually investigate anything in those cases. They’ll just ask some questions and if nothing is off too much the female will win 90% of the time…
        And if you are going thru a divorce and you’re a male you will know what the word “injustice” means…

    • tori green says:

      ~ the “underground” was far from being her “only available resource”.
      ~ Although the legal system is very very far from perfect or even the best so far, it isn’t 100% at fault here. This is a tragedy that many different factors played a role in.

  6. Kitty says:

    Who are you to say that spouses are to be trusted,this laws funded by the rich ,who stop at nothing to take kids away.

  7. Kitty says:

    It needs to be resolved women rights laws

  8. Adela says:

    This case is a little similar to the Skelton brothers case. The main difference being that in this case, the mother is the kidnapper instead of the father.
    Yet the media reports are totally different. Nobody has any sympathy for Mr Skelton (and nobody should), yet this mother has people trying to justify her actions. What she did is despicable. Period.

  9. Margo/Mom says:

    Gail–I think it is a fallacy that the “undergound” is about helping poor and battered women who cannot afford legal help. If that were their mission, the most straight-forward means of helping would be to provide legal assistance. In this case, I have never seen anything to indicate that this mom and this child were victims of domestic violence or battering. Such evidence would show up in terms of friends who might testify about injuries or ill treatment; medical records to show injuries, police reports and the like. I don’t believe that anything like that has ever surfaced. What has surfaced is a history (both the Mom and the Mom’s family) of clinical depression and suicide attempts and accounts from Mom’s friends and family that she was afraid of losing custody of her son because of that history.

    Someone’s suggestion that “the underground” accepted Timmothy but then killed the mother for fear she would tell where the Timmothy was hidden seems equally improbable. The folks who engage in such underground efforts speak to the sanctity of maternal bonds and they like–tending to hide children and mothers together. The problem doesn’t seem to be a fear of being found out–frequently there are family and friends who are actually aware of what is going on, but simply lie or don’t cooperate with law enforcement.

  10. Amy says:

    The theory that she was afraid of losing custody given her history makes the most sense. What doesn’t make sense is that if it was a murder-suicide, why would she hide the body?

    • Yes it does. Timothy must be underground somewhere.

      • Yeah, he’s underground somewhere alright. Probably a shallow grave in a ditch off the side of a highway somewhere.

      • underwatch says:

        In this new era of computer and phone forensics, it would make senses for law enforcement to obtain the devices of any family relatives or friends. This was done effectively with the search of Dede Evavold’s home and led to her prosecution. In missing children’s cases, this tactic should be use more frequently. There must be some electronic record that could help solve this case.

  11. tilly says:

    As if taking your own life and orphaning your son werent bad enough this heinous witch has either killed him or sent him away with other people and deprived him of his real family. Think I’m insensitive? Compared to her acts, I dont think so. And dont give me that crap about depression, I’ve suffered from it too. I have thought of suicide but never ever once did I think of killing my kids or taking them from their father. Dont make this lady a saint because she was suffering from depression, that’s twisted and stupid.

  12. FAITH says:

    I believe Amy took her son’s life. Because she did not want the Dad to have him. The Dad had said, “he would get custody of Timmothy because of her mental illness.” That triggered what followed. Amy could not live without Timothy. He became her reason to live. Without him, she could not live. After she killed him is how I think she had the courage to commit suicide. I think Amy took him to a couple different water parks and to buy toys to ease her guilt. Then she turns off her phone for several hours, and when she has seen again, she is alone. If Timmothy were handed off, there should be evidence on her computer and phone numbers that could be traced. She didn’t just hand him off, or you would think someone would have come forward by now. Surely the police have checked all Amy’s contacts and her computer and phone records. You cannot just take a child and hand off. You would think someone has seen something. She turned her phone off so that she could not be traced where she took his life and dumped or buried his body. Did she purchase a shovel? Did she carry one? Most likely he was put in water.

    I really hurt for her mother, Alana. I just cried. I cry that mothers can murder their own flesh and blood. We all need a network of support. My late husband committed suicide. I’ve had other experiences. I know that some mothers use their child to find purpose in life. They cannot share the child. They will hurt the child and reconcile they actually are saving the child from a life of unhappiness and pain. Or it is to get even with the father or grandparents. People should be very cautious and not threaten a person. Amy’s husband knew she suffered from depression and mental illness and irony is that he does not have custody of Timmothy. The tragedy is Timmothy was caught in the crosshairs and most likely lost his life because his mother was ill and his dad was going to take him from her.

  13. FAITH says:

    I want to answer a question. Why would Amy hide her son’s body? Because she did not want to be known as a murderer. She did not want anyone to know she could do such a horrible deed to her own flesh and blood. Most parents that have killed their children have tried to hide that they are the murderer. They blame it on someone else. That is why she took him to water parks and to buy toys first so everything looked so happy and normal. It was a cover up and to throw the police off, investigators and her family, and Timmothy’s dad off. To punish Timmothy’s dad.

  14. tori green says:

    This is exactly why i think there should be licenses to have kids…
    you need a license to drive a car ….and a child is much more complex then a car.
    I know it would be very difficult to set up and inforce and extremely controversial. However with global population the way it is it might be necessary one day and is realistically possible to implement.
    If you disagree please I would love to hear you point of view and pros and cons that might not be obvious here…

  15. tori green says:

    Was there ever any forensic evidence found that would hint at the possibility of this child being deceased?
    …she does sound very certain that they won’t find the kid…
    imagine the work you would have to put into finding someone so loyal to a horrible cause… even a relative, and if it isn’t you surely would have to go thru more then a few candidates before you find someone ok with something like this…
    … who will agree to risk a lot and for what possible reason?…
    wouldn’t you think she would just take the easy way out, just like she did committing a very selfish act of suicide instead of dealing with life.

  16. tori green says:

    Im guessing when the mother said “he’s with the people who cared about him” you think she meant in heaven?

    • tori green says:

      she obviously didn’t want the father to ever have even a shot at getting him back, the only way to make sure of that would be to kill him… and the letters were meant to throw the investigation off track…maybe to keep them from searching for a body of the victim and treating it as a murder case instead, making it a much less prioritised missing persons case… a lot of suicides are murder-suicides where the person kills their whole family and then themselves…

  17. Trevor says:

    He is not given to any one. He is gone. Where can he be during past 6 years, isolated and without any connection?

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